i feel selfish for being sad right now

i had an awesome day, like i met bridgit mendler and spent the day with my mom and my sister, like today was so fantastic

but now i am in my room staring at my wall and wishing i were not breathing

if someone tells you depression isn’t real, please kick them in the knee.

because if meeting your favorite person then feeling like death is a super great thing in the same day doesn’t strike you as odd then i don’t know what does

but i feel guilty i feel like i can’t be sad because my sister and mom had such a great time

normally i tell my mom when i feel this way but i don’t want to because i don’t her to feel like today wasn’t a good day; it was great.

i know people who i know irl will read this but i like to think when i type these things that i am talking to no one.

i hate sadness more than i hate mangoes 

also i think i should talk to my doctor about medicine because this is clearly not working atm

tagged: +personal  +depression 

i am a child i am 16 i am in high school

SO STOP TALKING ABOUT FINANCES AROUND ME, LIKE I KNOW IT IS GOOD TO BE FRUGAL AND TO SAVE BUT I AM GETTING SO STRESSED OUT OVER SOMETHING I CAN’T CONTROL.

I KNOW WE DON’T HAVE MONEY I KNOW WE CAN’T DO THINGS I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW BUT YOU DON’T HAVE TO TALK ABOUT IT TO ME I AM A CHILD I NEED TO WORRY ABOUT MY CHEMISTRY GRADE NOT MONEY OKAY LET ME HAVE TWO YEARS WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT MONEY PLEASE

I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO HAVE LOADS OF ANXIETY OVER THIS LIKE I CAN’T DO ANYTHING ABOUT THIS I CAN’T HELP I CAN’T FIX ANYTHING AND IT JUST MAKES ME FEEL TERRIBLE 

tagged: +personal  +parents 

I miss all my friends who are in college now.

cindy, meg, sydeia, alex, and of course rob. 

gosh i miss rob a lot. it’s weird not seeing him everyday and not knowing when i will see him next. but getting his snapchats makes me super happy. i sure do love that boy.

if any of you need a friend i am here!! i have not a lot of friends so be my friend if you want okay ily

xxoo

tagged: +personal  +college 

IM TRYING TO WIN A TAYLOR SWIFT CONTEST AND I GET MORE ENTRIES IF YOU CLICK THIS LINK!!

http://ts1989.com/9426

I would love it if you helped me out!!

tagged: +personal 

hair goals: matty, 1975

tagged: +personal 
i feel like im the worst so i always act like im the best :-)

i feel like im the worst so i always act like im the best :-)

tagged: +personal  +me  +mine  +face  +blue head 

im getting annoyed with every song i listen to and its so werid

tagged: +personal  +weird 

I feel like typing about my life so here I go.

Hello junior year is okay. I took a test on a book a ride the night before and i think i did pretty swell on it. I have a lot of new great friends this year which is so great because i love new people. I have a cool chorus class minus a few obnoxious people. Sadly, theatre is next semester. Robert is in college now. It is weird not seeing him everyday like I have the past two years/summers. He isn’t going very far away, about 45 minutes by car. But he doesn’t have a car there with him and I am terrified to drive in Atlanta traffic. It also isn’t practical for me to see him  on weekdays. He says I will see him in like 2 weekends from now so that’s good. 

Sailboat had her (she is officially a girl) first vet trip today. Baby had to get some shots and is now on medicine for a parasite. She did so well with the doctor!! I’m a proud mama.

in other news, my sister is coming home next wednesday and i am so excited!! she has been gone all summer and will be staying with us for a few weeks! my heart is full of joy. Although when I was growing up I wasn’t very fond of her, she is by far one of the greatest people I know and one of my best friends. sisters are seriously the best.

also also, i am sad cause i’ve come to terms that i really just have to stop giving people second chances. i am getting hurt by the same people over and over again and it is time i move on. i can’t keep surrounding myself with hurtful people.

it’s a new school year so i’m changing things up a bit

hope you guys have had a great week

xxoo

tagged: +personal  +update  +ya 

There was a news article about a guy who has been stealing cars at gas stations in my town and when I looked at his mug shot I found myself saying “dang why do you have to steal cars? you’re so cute”. 

criminals with tattoos are my type i guess

tagged: +personal 
every night

every night

tagged: +me  +mine  +face  +personal  +kitten  +cute 
saturday nights listening to saosin. 
it feels like 2010

saturday nights listening to saosin. 

it feels like 2010

i love her 

i love her 

tagged: +personal  +cat 
she thought i looked like a good bed

she thought i looked like a good bed

tagged: +personal  +me  +mine  +face  +cat 

sometimes i start to feel bad because i think i know someone but really they have a whole secret life they don’t talk to me about it. sometimes that makes me feel like i’m not important enough to know them fully?? like they don’t trust me or like me enough to open up to me when i literally tell them everything. it’s just kinda hurtful idk i’m stupid i guess

tagged: +personal  +rambling